It was my least favorite day of the week. It was the day after payday and the day I had to stop by my ex-wife's place and hand her the child support and alimony check. I didn't begrudge the kids their child support, but it just killed me to pay Eve alimony. Especially since the divorce was caused by her and what she did, or more to the point, didn't do.

I had gone through a bitter divorce and when it was final I swore off women. They were treacherous and unfaithful whores — all of them — and I was staying away from all of them from then on. It went all the way back to high school. I went steady with Brenda for nine months and all she would let me do was play with her tits and do some heavy necking. She kept telling me that she wasn't 'that kind of a girl' but I guess what she meant was that she wasn't that kind of a girl with me. One night when I was supposed to be at a family function with my folks I swung by her house and found her pulling a train for some guys on the football team.

Next was Darby who told me that she loved me to death and kept trying to get me to propose to her even though (as I came to find out) she had a steady date every Wednesday with two guys whose cocks she sucked.

Then it was off to college where Bethany, Mary and Millie all proved to be faithless sluts. Then I met Angel and everything seemed to be magical between us and I proposed and she accepted. Two days before the wedding a guy I knew said:

"You aren't really serious about marrying Angel, are you?"

"Of course I am. Why shouldn't I be?"

"Are you one of those guys that gets off on his girl fucking other guys?"

"Hell no."

"Then you better stay away from Angel."

"Why? What do you know?"

"At her bridal shower the other girls brought in a stripper and when he finished dancing Angel sucked him off and then he fucked her while the other girls cheered them on. When it was done she gave him her phone number and asked him to call. He did and she has seen him three times since the night of the party."

"How could you know that?"

"I was the stripper."

That night I told Angel what I'd found out and asked her if it was true and she ran crying into the bathroom, locked the door and wouldn't come out. I could hear her crying and saying over and over:

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I'm sorry."

I packed up and moved out of the apartment we shared. I graduated, found a job and decided to stay away from women. That decision lasted all of a month and then I met Jennifer. We clicked and after our fourth date we started having sex. After six months Jenn asked me if I'd given any thought to marriage and I told her bluntly that I hadn't. She asked me why and I told her the whole sad story and added that I just couldn't bring myself to trust women any more.

"That's silly baby. So you had a run of bad luck with some girls, so what? Not all women are easy sluts. I love you baby and I could never do something like that to the man I love."

Jenn kept after me to get married and finally after almost a year I caved in and married her. The marriage hummed along and it certainly seemed that Jenn was right when she said I'd just had a run of bad luck with the wrong girls. Then one afternoon in the third year of our marriage I came early to find her on her knees in the living room giving some guy I'd never seen before a blow job. I proceeded to beat the snot out of the asshole and while I was doing that Jennifer got on the phone, called the cops, told them that I was on a rampage and that she feared for her safety. The cops were there in minutes, pulled me off of the asshole that I'd caught with my wife and took me off to jail.

When it was over and the divorce was final I said, "Fuck all women" and got on with my life. When I needed or wanted sex I used professionals; it was just so much easier that way.

The thing about being a dedicated bachelor is that no one can stand it. The married women you know seem to take it as a personal affront to them and they are forever trying to fix you up with some candidate "Who is just perfect for you" and who will end your bachelor status. The married men that you know do the same only their reason is that they can't stand to see you happy when they aren't. The solution? Drag you down into the pit with them. I soon got to the point where I automatically found excuses every time someone invited me over for dinner or to a party.

But there is always someone that you can't say no to and one of those someone's was my best friend Tom. Tom asked me over for a barbecue one Saturday and when I got there I found that there were four couples and a single woman. Not again I thought, but Tom was my best friend so I didn't turn and bolt for the door. What I did do, after Tom's wife Mary Beth introduced me to Eve, was ignore her. It wasn't an easy thing to do. Eve was a tall woman, about five foot nine, with a trim figure, long red hair and the face of an angel, but all of the other women in my life had been great looking also. That was probably one of the reasons they were so popular with other guys. Mary Beth would have had better luck trying to set me up with an ugly woman.

I spent all my time at the party socializing with the others who were there. Half way through the party Mary Beth came up to me and asked me why I was behaving 'so crassly' toward Eve.

"I'm not behaving anything toward her. I don't know her and I don't want to know her."

"Still, she is alone and it wouldn't hurt you any to be a little more social where she is concerned."

"And just why is she here alone Mary Beth? You and I both know the answer to that question. You invited the both of us with the intent on getting us together even knowing how I feel about that. If she is not having a good time Mary Beth it is your fault, not mine. If you felt the need to fix her up with some one you should have picked someone other than me."

She gave me a nasty look and went storming off. A couple of minutes later Tom came up to me:

"Sorry bud. I warned her, but she just knew the two of you would be right for each other."

"How so?"

"Eve has been married twice and both marriages ended when she caught her husbands with other women. Mary Beth was sure that you would be comfortable with a woman who felt that way about cheating. I mean just how likely is it that a woman like that would cheat on her man. Mary Beth convinced Eve that someone who has been through what you have wouldn't be likely to cheat on his woman. Mary Beth thought that it would be a match made in Heaven."

"Yeah, well I'm sorry Tom, but you know that I've sworn off women and I'm not about to change my mind."

Shortly after talking with Mary Beth and Tom I left and went home.

I was extremely surprised when two days later I received a call at work from Eve. She was going to be near where I worked at lunchtime and she asked me to have lunch with her. My first impulse was to say that I was sorry, but I was snowed under with work and couldn't get away from my desk. At the same time I was intrigued; why was a woman I ignored calling me? I agreed to meet her at a restaurant across the street from my office building. She cut right to the chase:

"I'm a pretty good looking broad and I'm not all that used to men ignoring me. The fact that you did aroused my curiosity and being a rather forward type of individual I decided to go to the source to find out why."

"The fact of the matter is that it had nothing to do with you. My behavior that day was aimed at Mart Beth. I wanted to make her as uncomfortable as I could where you were concerned. I'd had it up to my eyebrows with her constant attempts to fix me up with someone. I'd told her at least fifty times not to do it, that I didn't want it, and she still went and did it anyway. I figured that if I ignored whoever she invited to meet me that it might embarrass her enough to make her stop."

"Mary Beth told me your past circumstances and I can't say I blame you for not wanting a woman prowling around the edges of your life, but you do know that we all aren't bitches, don't you?"

To make a long story a little shorter by the end of lunch I had asked her out and nine months later we were married.

The first two years were great and then the first kid came along and Eve transferred all of her attention to little Jenny. I'm not saying that Eve split her attention between Jenny, and me I'm saying that I got NO attention and Jenny got it all. Our sex life went from three and four times a week before Jenny (right up to the eighth month) to once every two weeks after Jenny. With me getting so little sex it was amazing that Eve managed to get pregnant again, but it happened. After Jimmy was born Eve had no time for me at all. Everything was Jenny this and Jimmy that. Sex went to once a month and then to once every six weeks. All I was around the house was the breadwinner and not even a good one according to Eve who always seemed to need money for something.

I made the unilateral decision to get a vasectomy as I sure wasn't going to father another kid and make it even worse than it already was. This outraged Eve because she had her heart set on having four kids. I responded with:

"You need to have sex to get pregnant and we don't, remember?"

"Is that all you think about is sex?"

"It is when I don't get any" and things went down hill from there.

I began working late, meeting fellow workers after work for a beer, anything to keep from going home and then one night I came home and Eve and the kids weren't there. There was a note on the kitchen table telling me that she had gone to spend a few days visiting her mother. The next morning as I left the house for work a man came up to me and served me with divorce papers. Eve was claiming "irreconcilable differences." Well, I'd always known women were treacherous bitches. I didn't bother to fight the divorce except to point out that the house was mine before we got married. Why bother, we didn't have a marriage anyway.

Six months after the divorce Eve moved in with a guy and they set up house keeping. Didn't get married, just moved in together. I know in my heart that the reason Eve didn't marry the guy was so she could still gouge me for alimony. Nine months after they moved in together Eve had her third kid and eleven months later she had her fourth.

In our city the Friend of the Court was notoriously inefficient and the child support and alimony payments sent to them could take up to six weeks to get to those they were intended for. After several calls from Eve telling me that she had no money to buy food for the kids I got into the habit of hand carrying the checks to her. I made the check out to her and down in the left hand corner on the line that said "For" I put in 'child support and alimony payment for (and the date) and I had Eve initial it. If I ever got called in for non-support I would be covered.

I usually timed my visits so I could spend an hour or so with Jenny and Jimmy before I left. On this particular night I was ruining late and when I got there Eve had already put the kids to bed. With the kids in bed I had no reason to stay so I gave Eve the check, waited for her to initial it and I had turned to go when Eve said:

"Wait a second Art, I have something I need to talk with you about. Please sit down on the couch and I'll be right back."

She left the room and three minutes later she came back in the room stark naked except for a pair of high heels. I have to admit that I got an immediate hard on.

"What the hell is this about Eve?"

"It's what I need to talk with you about Art. Herb isn't worth a shit in bed and I'm going crazy. I need a good fuck Art. Herb is working swings this month so we have five hours before he will get home. Help me out here Art, please?"

"What the fuck is wrong with you Eve? One of the reasons for the divorce was that you wouldn't fuck me."

"That's ancient history Art. I'm offering now. No strings attached pussy. I don't know what went wrong in our marriage, but you were always great in bed. Help me out here Art, please?"

Talk about mixed emotions, I had a bunch of them. As many times as I had been cheated on it went against the grain for me to do to some other guy what had been done so often to me. But I had an immense dislike of Herb because he was living off my money. I knew for a fact that my alimony check paid the rent and that his paycheck covered groceries and utilities and had enough left over to pay for them to go out and party every weekend. The bastard wouldn't make Eve marry him; he just coasted along on my money.

Then there was Eve herself. I had spent the better part of the last three years wishing for all kinds of bad things to happen to her so why should I help her out? On the other hand I hadn't been laid in almost a month and on the weekend I had intended to call a friend of a friend who was a light hook. I could do Eve, save myself some money and get back at Herb all at the same time. While all that roiled around in my head I had an idea. The little light bulb that you see in cartoons came on just over my head. Why not, I said to myself. Do her and do her so good that she will want to do it again the next time I stopped by. I stood up and said:

"You want it, you come and get it," and I stood there to see what she would do.